08.25.05
rainy day dilemma
yeah, its another gloomy day. there’s something about the weather that just puts me in the mood to be despondent and depressive…
…how far would you go on searching for something that you don’t know if it even exists? sometimes we spend the rest of our lives searching for futile dreams and fantasies.
…one of these days im going to veer away from my routine and spend the day writing my head and hands off. i miss the feeling of losing yourself in the wonder of your words, your thoughts running crazy in your mind, and the confusion of what to immortalize in that piece of paper (or in another case, in that blank sheet of computer document). it feels good to see the words coming alive in paper, the wonder of the pen giving shape to your thoughts, the hum of your fingers typing down the words. yeah, it feels good.
…soon, all will be forgotten. you will be forgotten. it would be such a big relief, a freedom from this obsessive bondage. one of these days, ill have the guts to admit to myself and say, "It is done. At last." and then ill wish you luck and probably tell you that yes, it would never die, thank you so much, but im letting all of it go.
